


Call of Silence

by Zana_Lee



Category: Boruto: Naruto Next Generations, Naruto
Genre: Character Death, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, Eventual Smut, F/M, Sexual Tension, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-10
Updated: 2021-03-16
Packaged: 2021-03-17 12:20:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,047
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29966283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zana_Lee/pseuds/Zana_Lee
Summary: Because Sarada refuses to accept that the shinobi world's last hope would come from the man who betrayed it.
Relationships: Kawaki/Uchiha Sarada
Comments: 6
Kudos: 27





	1. Chapter 1

Call of Silence

chapter 1 – after the fall

**_“I know that you'll find me there,  
After the fall,   
I know that you're waiting,  
I know that you'll find me there.”_ **

It had taken a little over a day to reach the target area where the supposed drop was said to take place. These pick-ups never came without risk – not only were they wanted shinobi but, considering the fact that both Uchiha Sarada and Akimichi Chocho were both from Konoha and in one way or another connected to Uzumaki Boruto – well, it just made things that much more of a risk. Thinking his name still hurt. Sarada had never imagined the boy she grew up with would change as much as he had. It was a constant struggle to remind herself that it wasn’t truly _him._ That he was simply a vessel now. Nothing more, nothing less.

_And yet._

The face she saw in her nightmares, the dark, taunting voice she heard – it was Boruto. _Her_ Boruto. At some point, it had become hard to separate the him she knew from what he was now. It was hard to forgive what his hands had done to the people she cared about. No matter what the future held, Sarada wasn’t sure that she could forgive him, that she could ever look at him in the same way. Had she truly given up on him? _No_. Not entirely. If there was a way. To save him. To bring him back. Yes, Sarada would do whatever it took. But it had been years and while her mother, father and the Hokage had left them – searching for a way to change things, they hadn’t returned. Not for a long time. What was left of the Konoha shinobi had grouped together, attempting to survive underground until something could be done – some plan could be formulated to defeat the invading Ōtsutsuki.

Sarada was still waiting.

That was all she ever did. Wait. Perhaps…perhaps she’d given up hope altogether, living out her days until she was eventually captured or killed. At this point, she wasn’t sure which option would be worse. But she knew for sure that she would die violently, that that was the fate that awaited her at the end of this road. It was the one thing she’d ultimately made her peace with. Since the day Boruto lost control for the last time, she felt like all she did was move, go through the motions every day, doing what needed to be done – being a tool, something she’d never quite understood before the fall of the shinobi world. Now, it made sense to her. What made a shinobi useful, what truly made a shinobi a tool – was loss, pain, fear. Using trauma to keep yourself moving forward. Because a shinobi with no experience meant nothing for a village. Which was another reason genin were sent out into the world so soon. And now she was just another one of them. Another product of the life she was born into as an Uchiha and as a shinobi.

“Sarada,” Chocho’s voice was faint, her touch light on Sarada’s arm. She jerked her chin towards the building. The intel they’d received had brought them here – to a town called Sora-ku. Hatake Kakashi, the unwilling leader of their so-called resistance had sent Sarada and Chocho to investigate – mostly because no one else was available and because they desperately needed the supplies. Kakashi hadn’t said as much but it was obvious to everyone, and to Sarada herself, that he was trying to protect her, to keep her away from the missions that put her – one of the last Uchiha – at risk. Her eyes might help _secure the future_ , after all. Whatever that meant. If Sarada hadn’t overheard Kakashi mention this mission, he probably would have sent someone else – anyone else. But she needed to get out of the caves, too long in there had her feeling like the walls were closing in, slowly suffocating her. Here she could breathe, the night air, the cool wind was crisp – a hint of coming rain in the air, and Sora-ku was dark, the only sound a soft howling of the wind against concrete, the slight crunch of dirt beneath her sandal. And there, in the window of the building Sarada saw what Chocho had alerted her to. A shadow in the window of the target location. It was faint, possibly nothing, but with the angle of the moonlight the movement of a person was unmistakable. Sarada and Chocho made eye contact, years of working together made it easy to communicate without saying a word. Chocho shot off towards the left, keeping low as she went around the building to enter from the other side. They’d spent the entire day covertly scouting the area and mentally mapping the layout – so that they could make a quick escape or alter plans if need be. The intel had simply suggested there would be supplies dropped off, messages were hard to deliver these days because it was nearly impossible to get past the Ōtsutsuki but when they did manage to make it through, the trouble of decoding began. Suna had been stockpiling supplies in secret for years and thanks to the Hokage’s bond with the Kazekage, supplies came as frequently as possible, although Sarada had no idea what the situation was like in Wind. She assumed it was the same everywhere.

As far as she knew, no one from Suna had ever stayed behind to chat. It was too dangerous and there was no way that the Kazekage would sacrifice anyone like that, so the only possible option was that whoever was lurking in the building would be an enemy. The building, much like the others in Sora-ku stood desolate. A shell of what it once was. No doors, no windows. Just a structure of walls and floors.

Sarada stepped through what she assumed used to be the front door, her eyes sharpening as the Sharingan spun to life. She stepped over some rocks and debris, it was clear the building was coming apart but she kept her back close to the walls none the less. The foyer was empty – at least from what her Sharingan could see, the enemy was on one the higher floors. There was no way they could turn back though, if they failed – if they couldn’t get the supplies, the situation in the caves could turn dire. Food had already began to run dangerously low and they would soon have to start rationing. Farming wasn’t an option if they wanted to remain undetected, and finding other sources of food and supplies had proved impossible, at least in the last few years when the Ōtsutsuki had become even more relentless in their pursuit of the Konoha shinobi. Sometimes Sarada wondered if they were so dead set on finding them because of Boruto – that there was some part of him still aware in there and that he wanted to find them. But she knew not to think like that. Boruto was gone. She knew that.   
Urgency rushed under her skin as she took the stairs as quickly and quietly as she could. Whoever they’d seen would only have one goal and Sarada would have to stop them. Whatever it took.   
Sarada stopped on the stairs, staring into the room to her left, her fingers digging into the wall where the doorframe should have been. Just as the intel said, the supplies were up on the fifth floor, containers set out neatly in the room. But there was someone in there. Cloaked. His back to her. But she could see the tense set of his shoulders. He was ready for a fight. Sarada knew that Chocho should be coming up the stairs behind her at any moment and fear set into her heart. She would need to take care of this before Chocho got involved. She wasn’t about to lose Chocho too. She _couldn’t._  
Sarada pushed herself forward, further into the room. “Step away from the supplies.”  
The man stayed still, only his head turned slightly in her direction – it was the distraction Sarada had hoped for and she pushed herself into action – appearing in front of him in the next second, her heel connected with his abdomen, sending him flying from the room and back towards the stairs. Sarada pushed herself towards him and he grunted, twisting mid-air with such incredible speed that Sarada only had time to throw her arms up to block the kick. She cursed lowly, using the strength she inherited from her mother, she struck out again and he caught the blow in one hard but it didn’t matter, all she needed to do was make contact. The blow knocked him down, through one, two, three, four floors until he landed in a heap at the bottom. Sarada leapt through the hole he’d created – intending to drop onto him, to be sure he was dead – but the spot he’d fallen in laid empty at her feet.   
“Tch,” Sarada let out a harsh breath, her eyes scanning the area around her. He wasn’t a typical enemy. She wouldn’t be able to deal with this as quickly as she’d hoped. Her previous attack had kicked years of dust into the air around her – it would make it harder for Chocho to see. Sarada slid in behind a broken wall, pressing her back to it as she used her senses, trying to feel the enemy out but the room around her was deathly quiet, not even the sounds of the night outside rising around her. He was good. Too good for a random shinobi. But he wasn’t Ōtsutsuki – she would have known the moment she’d first made contact with him. Which village was he affiliated with? Konoha? Perhaps. But what would another Konoha shinobi be doing out here, unless he’d been planning to take the supplies for himself. That made him an enemy of Konoha and Sarada would have to deal with him regardless. And where was Chocho? Going around to the back entrance should not have taken her this long. Sarada hadn’t sensed anyone else, but she wouldn’t rule out the possibility that Chocho could have encountered another enemy. Which meant that this wasn’t random at all. It was an ambush. Could the Ōtsutsuki-  
 _No.  
_ Sarada closed her eyes, trying to control her breathing. Now was not the time to let herself panic. She needed to stay calm. Focus on the situation at hand. Once she took care of this guy she could consider the possibilities – until then, she needed to forget about the outside world. She needed to shut down and allow herself to become a tool. Konoha’s weapon.   
Something shifted to her left and Sarada’s lids snapped open, her eyes struggling to adjust to the dark – but he was there. She brought her hands up but it was too late, the blow connected to her face, sending her reeling back – her hood slipping from her head, but her hand was already in her pouch – fingers grabbing at a kunai as her Sharingan came to life once more. The enemy hesitated for a moment and Sarada wasn’t about to let the opening go to waste, she slammed a kick into his side and he hit the ground hard, sliding a few feet away but Sarada was on him before he could make another move. She lifted the kunai high and for that brief moment there was nothing inside of her – no hate, no love, no pain and no regrets. And then it all came rushing back at the sound of his voice.  
“Sarada?”  
Her arm froze in the air, breaths away from his jugular. Her lips parted in a sharp inhale as she stared down at him, at the face underneath the hood for the first time. Her hand shook as the kunai slipped from her fingers, clattering to the ground next to his head.   
Chocho appeared in the doorway then, calling out, but Sarada couldn’t look up – she couldn’t move her eyes away from him. He didn’t move underneath her, his eyes simply stared up at her, waiting for her next move and silently telling her he would allow whatever she did.  
Sarada went limp, the battle draining from her almost immediately, the hand that had been bracing her against his chest fell to her side. And her heart _ached._ Because this wasn’t possible. This couldn’t be happening.   
Her voice broke on his name. “ _Kawaki?_ ”  
“Kawaki?!” Chocho stepped into the room, inching closer to them carefully, her kunai flipping into her hand.  
Sarada thought she wasn’t breathing. That somehow the enemy had killed her and this wasn’t real. But Kawaki continued to stare up at her with those storm sky eyes of his, the eyes she’d always secretly liked. But now – she felt fear. Their last moments seemed to play in her mind on repeat the metallic smell of blood stinging her nostrils as if it were real. As if it were happening now.   
“Sarada.”  
Her eyes focussed on him again, lying underneath her, making no move to push her off or to attack.   
“What are you doing here?” she asked, finally. Her voice a thin thread between them. “Did you know we were coming?”  
“You, specifically? No.”  
Sarada nodded slowly. “But you knew Konoha shinobi were headed here.” Not a question.  
Kawaki answered anyway. “Yes,”  
“Why were you waiting for Konoha shinobi, Kawaki?”   
“Because I have information.”  
Sarada answered immediately. “I don’t believe you.”  
Chocho stepped up to them and Sarada could see the blood on her hands. Not her own, but still wet. “It’s not mine,” Chocho said when she noticed Sarada’s eyes moving from her hands and then back to Kawaki. “I found the Suna shinobi outside. I’m assuming they delivered the supplies. But I do think pretty boy over here killed them. It’s a shame he’s so attractive, isn’t it?”  
Kawaki gave no reaction to that, his eyes still on Sarada’s face. “Did you kill them?” she asked.  
Kawaki’s lips thinned and Sarada noticed how dry and chapped they were for the first time. When was the last time he had a drink of water? “They attacked me first.”  
“Somehow,” she said, pushing herself up. “I don’t believe you.”  
Chocho hummed in agreement.   
“Get up,” Sarada ordered, her hands going to her hips but she never let her guard down. Kawaki stood. He moved to put his hood back into place but Chocho shoved her kunai at him. “Hey, no sudden movements, pretty boy.”  
“Can she stop calling me that?” he directed the question to Sarada, who didn’t even bother answering him. While she appeared calm her insides were shaking. Kawaki had been one of the few people she’d truly trusted. And he’d betrayed her. A part of her had hoped she would never have to face him again, or face how his betrayal had ripped her in two. Because Kawaki had turned on her. He’d tried to kill the person most important to her.

And she’d been powerless to stop him.

“Did you destroy the bodies, Chocho?” she sounded calm. Too calm. Chocho turned a sharp look towards Sarada.   
“Yeah, of course.”   
Lightning lit the room up briefly and thunder rumbled in the sky outside. “Let’s get the supplies.” Sarada told her as she walked past Kawaki to retrieve her kunai from the ground. Not once did he take his eyes off of her.  
“What about him?” Chocho jutted her chin towards Kawaki and Sarada, very reluctantly, turned her gaze back to him.   
“What about you?” Sarada turned Chocho’s question on him.  
Kawaki’s voice was deeper than she remembered but still…just as familiar. “Whatever you want, Sarada.”  
Sarada’s head tilted to the side, her hair falling over her face. “And what if what I want is to kill you?”  
“I won’t stop you.”  
Sarada tensed visibly. “You don’t mean that.”  
Kawaki took a step towards her and Chocho shifted uneasily, her hand tightening around the kunai. “Do it,” Kawaki whispered lowly and Sarada found herself following the way his lips curved around the words. “Kill me, Sarada.”  
Sarada’s eyes flipped up to his. “I don’t have orders to kill you. You’ll be coming with us. As a prisoner.”  
This got a reaction. Kawaki’s eyes narrowed. “I never agreed to be a prisoner.”  
“Who said you had a choice?” Chocho asked cheekily and Kawaki turned his glare on her.   
“We need to hurry.” Sarada said, coming around Kawaki to restrain him. He tensed but stilled when Chocho came closer. “Bring the cart closer, Chocho. I’ll watch him.”  
“Roger that,” Chocho dashed out of the front door as Kawaki took a seat on the fallen rocks somewhat uncomfortably. The storm finally started outside, pouring down and falling through the cracks in the walls, dripping down around them.  
Sarada stayed facing Kawaki but it was hard for her to look at him fully. She needed to focus on the mission now and she couldn’t do that when all she could see was what he’d done. Kawaki continued to watch her and Sarada had to wonder what kind of expression he had when he looked at her. What he was thinking.  
“Sarada-“ he began after the tense silence stretched between them.  
“Don’t.” Sarada took a deep breath, shaking her head. “Don’t speak to me, Kawaki.”  
Chocho stepped inside then, her cloak drenched. “Cart’s ready and as close as I can get it.”  
“Good,” Sarada turned on her heel. “Watch him. It’ll be faster if I do this myself.”  
Chocho didn’t argue, she walked to the spot Sarada had been standing in as Sarada rushed up the stairs, creating two Kage Bunshin as she went. Her father had taught her the technique before he left (once again) and Sarada’s current limit was set at two clones since it wasn’t a technique she liked to practice. For many reasons.  
Chocho kept her gaze on Kawaki as Sarada and her clones moved back and forth between where the supplies were and the cart and the actual loading took all of ten minutes.   
“What do we do with him?” Sarada whispered to Chocho. “We only have the two horses and I’m not sharing.”  
Chocho eyed Kawaki appreciatively. “I wouldn’t mind sharing with him.”  
“No,” Kawaki said, his gaze moving between the girls.   
“Your loss,” Chocho batted her eyelashes at him but she didn’t seem all that offended.   
Sarada’s face was tight when she turned away. “ _Fine_. Let’s go.”  
Kawaki stood and went into the space between Chocho and Sarada as he followed her out into the rain. Without his hood his hair was soaked and sticking to his forehead within seconds. Chocho stayed close behind him and from the tense way Kawaki walked, Sarada knew that he was very aware that Chocho wouldn’t hesitate to kill him if he made a move against them.   
Sarada turned when they reached her horse and she reached a hand out, stroking along its face. “It’s okay, Chocho.” She said loudly, attempting to speak over the rain.  
Chocho hesitated for only a moment before she moved away towards her own horse. Sarada’s face lifted towards Kawaki and she seemed to take pity on him, her hands reaching up around him to lift his hood back into place. It happened so fast that he had no time to hide the shock from his face.   
“Get up.” Sarada indicated towards the horse and Kawaki gripped the saddle with his bound hands, hoisting himself up. Sarada waited until he was settled before pulling herself up.   
“Your hands.” She called back to him and Kawaki shoved his wrists forward to the side of her. Sarada quickly undid the rope she’d tied around him, gripping it tightly between her fingers.   
“Put your arms around me.” Sarada said through clenched teeth.  
This time, Kawaki did hesitate. “…What did you say?”  
“ _Don’t make me repeat myself_.”  
Kawaki’s arms went around her waist slowly and Sarada grabbed his wrists impatiently, tugging him forward so that she could bind them together once again. To escape from the horse he would have to take her with him and there was no way Sarada would let him get away again.  
“You have got to be kidding me.” Kawaki hissed from behind her.  
“Shut up back there.”   
It was an awkward position for them both but it was the only way forward. And that was all Sarada could do. Keep moving forward.  
She moved the horse into position, bringing up the rear of the cart while Chocho took the front. The horses on the cart were trained and knew the way home should something happen. Chocho gave a low whistle, one Sarada barely caught over the rain. She whistled back and Choco took off, the cart right behind her. Sarada nudged her horse’s side and Kawaki grunted when it took off in a sprint, his chest knocking into her back. Sarada ignored it as she leaned forward slightly, her hands tightening on the reins.   
_Why were you waiting for Konoha shinobi, Kawaki?_  
 _Because I have information.  
_ Sarada had to wonder what information Kawaki could possibly have that would be of any use to Konoha. But, more importantly –

Why now?  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. Fault Line

**_“They said we could be heroes,  
Save the world from itself,  
But we're the ones dying.”_ **

****

Some hours later, around dawn when the rain had finally cleared up, they stopped to water the horses at a small stream. Sarada had disappeared into the trees to ensure the area was secure, while Chocho kept an eye on Kawaki and protected the cart with the supplies. When Sarada returned not five minutes later, intending to ignore Kawaki altogether, she headed towards where Chocho stood. He was where she’d left him, standing by her horse, staring out towards the stream, face hidden by the hood of his cloak. She still felt uneasy. About seeing him. About him even being here. She could have gone her whole life without seeing him again and she would have been okay with that. Not that she didn’t think about him from time to time, she did. Sometimes she did catch herself in daydreams of what he’d been like _before._ Or at least who she thought he was. That was a lie, obviously. Kawaki wasn’t someone you could trust. Or get close to.  
Sarada went up to the stream, putting a good amount of distance between her and _him._ “All good here?” Chocho glanced over at Kawaki where he stood, rather awkwardly, pretending very hard that he wasn’t trying to hear what they were saying. Her friend hummed in response.  
Sarada sighed. “The perimeter is secure, but I did see signs that someone passed through here a few days ago. We should move on quickly.”   
Chocho wasn’t listening at all. “It’s a shame, you know.”  
Sarada glanced at Chocho who was still staring at Kawaki openly. “…What is?” the question came out slowly, hesitantly.  
“That he grew up like _that._ ” Chocho fanned herself a little. “ _Damn._ How are you able to stand being on a horse with him for this long? If it was me,” she made an appreciative sound. “I would have-”  
“I know what you would have done, Chocho.” Sarada rolled her eyes.   
“How close are you two getting in that saddle exactly?”   
Sarada pursed her lips prissily. “Let’s get going.”  
Chocho put her palm to Sarada’s forehead and she was swatted away almost immediately, a shrewd laugh escaping her lips when Sarada stormed off towards Kawaki.  
“We’re leaving.” She told him and Kawaki cleared his throat, glancing away before he gave a single nod.  
With the rising morning sun illuminating his face under the hood, Sarada had to – reluctantly – admit that Chocho wasn’t wrong. Kawaki was just as handsome as ever and she hated admitting that. Partly because she wanted to hate _everything_ about him. She really did. But when his cheekbones caught the light, those steely eyes shining slightly in the light she had to force her gaze away. Kawaki looked down at her as if he’d sensed her gaze, his tongue coming out to wet his dry lips almost nervously.  
“How far are we from…where we’re going?” He finally asked.  
Sarada ignored him and reached into her bag where it hung from the horse’s side, with forced movements she removed her water bottle and handed it to him. “Here. Drink.”   
Kawaki eyed the bottle but he didn’t reach for it, instead his eyes went from her to the bottle slowly.  
“Tch.” Sarada shook her head. “I’m not trying to poison you.” She unscrewed the lid impatiently and took a sip herself. “See?”  
“I know.” He seemed a bit angry himself then as he lifted his bound wrists, hands crossed over each other and tied tightly. Sarada closed her eyes for a moment. “Oh.” He physically could not take the bottle from her.   
“ _Yeah_.” It was obviously he was trying his _best_ not to snap at her.   
She inhaled sharply and released a deep sigh. “Sorry.” She mumbled grudgingly and lifted the bottle to his mouth, trying not to fixate on the way his lips parted and curved around the water bottle – or the fact that she’d just taken a sip mere seconds ago. Kawaki drank deeply, droplets of water running from the corners of his lips and down his chin and Sarada followed their paths, dripping down onto his cloak. How long ago had he had anything to eat or drink? She owed him nothing, but at the same time, she didn’t want him to die of thirst of starvation. When they’d clashed in Sora-ku he had seemed somewhat weaker than she remembered from when they’d trained together.  
Sarada pulled the bottle back when he turned his head away and she looked anywhere but him as she secured the cap back onto the top of the bottle and placed it back into her bag. Chocho wiggled her brows suggestively and Sarada glared back at her in response.  
“When’s the last time you ate, Kawaki?”  
He was silent for a moment. “I’m fine.”  
Sarada looked up at him, hands on her hips. “I have food.”  
“I don’t want _you_ feeding me.”  
She threw her hands up. “Fine, then. Stay hungry. What do I care?”  
“Clearly you _do_ care. You offered.” He threw in and she shot him a glare. “ _Shut up._ ”  
She mentioned to the saddle impatiently, indicating for him to get up.   
“Am I going to be holding on to you again?”  
Sarada closed her eyes, desperately searching for patience. “Got a problem with that too?” she didn’t give him a chance to respond, “Well, too bad. _Get up_.”  
Kawaki’s lips thinned but he said nothing else, hoisting himself up into the saddle once more. Sarada followed once he was settled, once again tying his arms around her waist.   
Chocho glanced back over her shoulder at them. “Have fun back there.”  
Sarada grumbled under her breath as Chocho took off, the cart behind her, and Sarada pulled up the rear. Again, Kawaki’s chest bumped into her, his hips rocking up once uncontrollably as the horse sped up.   
“What the hell is she talking about?” he grumbled behind her.  
“Just shut up, Kawaki.”   
_How close are you two getting in that saddle exactly?_ The reason Sarada had gotten so annoyed was because Chocho had been right, and she’d know that. Kawaki was close. _Extremely_ close. There was no way around it, yes. But that didn’t mean Sarada had to like it. Her body was a different story altogether. Despite the fact that she despised him, that having him here was above all – painful. Her body hadn’t gotten the memo, apparently. It was all kinds of happy – in various places. Feeling him against her, his hips kicking up against her ever so often, broad chest pressed up against her back, his arms – however forced – around her waist. His heavy scent all around her.  
Sarada swallowed deeply, her fingers tightening on the reins. She needed to get away from him. She needed space. Separation. Having him this close made it impossible to think clearly. Looking into his eyes just made her remember that day, forcing it to play over and over in her head. Her own pathetic begging in her ears and she hated it. It was easier when she wasn’t looking at him. The contradictions in what she was feeling crossed wires in her brain. Thankfully they would arrive at the caves within a few hours.

Which only left a few excruciating hours with Kawaki.

x-x-x-x-

A few minutes from the cave entrance, Chocho had slowed their party down by lifting a fist into the air. Sarada sped up slightly, going around the cart and past Chocho down the somewhat narrow path. To anyone else, the scenery in front of them was a solid mountainside, thick greenery all around making the path hard to travel. The horses grew uneasy the further they went down the path but Sarada knew to wait until the last moment, just as Kakashi had taught her. She felt Kawaki stiffen, almost as if he knew what was coming. Chakra rushed into her eyes, her gaze sharpening almost immediately.   
“Release,” Sarada whispered lowly and the genjutsu around them faded. Kawaki said nothing but she could feel the unease in the way he sat. The mountainside faded and so did the overgrown path around them. The entrance to the cave was covered by a boulder that appeared – from the front – to be blocking any way into the caves, but as Sarada brought the horse around she could feel Kawaki leaning forward to try and get a better look. And there at the entrance she could see Inojin. He wasn’t alone. Thanks to her Sharingan, Sarada could see them clearly. The girl jumping up, trying to reach for a paint brush that Inojin – who was much taller than her – was keeping just out of reach. His arm was laid easily _around her waist._ Anger was quickly replaced by the dread swirling in her stomach. This was last person she wanted here now. Fate was fucking cruel sometimes.   
Kawaki went very still behind her, finally recognizing the girl with Inojin, but there was no avoiding this now. It had been years since Kawaki had seen any of them – and he hadn’t expected Himawari so soon. Sarada knew that Kawaki had no expected Himawari to look like this. Or to be here for that matter. For a moment, Sarada wanted to turn around – to ask Chocho to take Himawari away so that they could prepare her. And him. But it was already too late, she’d seen them. Her face lighting up, arm raised to wave at them in greeting.   
“Shit,” Sarada whispered, pulling on the reins to bring her horse to a stop.   
Hima had taken only a few steps when Inojin’s face tensed. He’d seen Kawaki. In a flash he had an arm around Himawari’s waist, pulling her back against his chest. A move Sarada hadn’t missed. She frowned slightly but Inojin’s face remained fiercely protective.  
“Hima, wait-”  
Surprise flashed on the Uzumaki’s features as she met Sarada’s gaze and then her eyes widened. Face paled. She’d seen Kawaki. Her lips shaped his name, one hand reaching out towards him but then Inojin hauled her away, back somewhere into the depths of the cave. Chocho leapt from her horse, shooting Sarada a pointed look before she hurried into the caves after Inojin.   
“What is she –” Kawaki stopped short and Sarada felt him inhale as his chest expanded against her back. “Are they all there?”  
“Why?” she asked humourlessly. “Afraid to finally face them?”  
Kawaki didn’t answer and honestly, she hadn’t expected him to. Sarada undid his restraints, pushing back against him to dismount before reaching up and to retie the rope around his wrists that were swollen and raw in places. It was as Kawaki was climbing down from the horse that Inojin returned.   
“What the hell is _he_ doing here, Sarada?”  
She glanced at Inojin over her shoulder, keeping a hand on Kawaki’s restraints. “He’s here to speak to the Rokudaime.”   
Inojin kept a distrustful look on Kawaki. “He’s not here. He went somewhere with Mitsuki.”  
“Then we lock him up until they return.” She said easily and Kawaki stepped back.   
“No,” he said, voice hard. “You are _not_ locking me up.”  
“Again,” Sarada turned back to Kawaki, red eyes narrowing. “You don’t have a choice.”  
Kawaki’s lip curled slightly. “Want to bet?”  
“We can, but I thought you had information to share. It shouldn’t come as a surprise to you but we don’t trust you.”   
Kawaki didn’t back down. “I don’t care, Sarada. The answer is no.”  
“Then you leave.” Sarada sighed heavily. “Choose, Kawaki. I don’t have all day.”  
She knew why Kawaki didn’t want to be caged – years of being kept and abused by Kara still haunted him, she could see that in his eyes. While she didn’t quite know what he was feeling, there had been a time where Sarada had thought she understood him. The flash of fear in his eyes unearthed emotions she’d locked away years ago and for a moment she felt transported back to when he’d first arrived in Konoha – the distrust between the two of them, her undeniable interest in him as a person. She’d wanted to get to know him. As if he was a mystery she needed to solve. Now, she wished she hadn’t.   
“Fine,” Kawaki relented after a moment.   
Sarada nodded, fingers curling around his arm. “Come on then.”  
Inojin turned to come with them but Sarada shook her head. “I’ll be fine.” Inojin looked like he would argue for a long moment and then he relented, stepping out of the way from them to pass. Kawaki was quiet as Sarada pulled him along, leading him down and deeper into the hallways of the cave. She moved slowly, peeking around corners to make sure they encountered no one, but mostly she hoped Himawari wouldn’t seek them out. Hopefully Chocho was keeping her away. The last thing anyone needed was for Kawaki and the Uzumakis to meet before he had a chance to speak to Kakashi. She’d doubted he had any information to share before, mostly because Sarada was dead set on not trusting him, but she could reluctantly admit that Kawaki had done nothing specifically bad since she’d seen him. Him agreeing to be locked up also wasn’t something she took lightly. She glanced at him over her shoulder. His gaze was on the floor and with her Sharingan she could easily see his troubled expression in the dark. But she knew it wasn’t the prison cell that awaited that bothered him so. It was seeing Himawari. His time living with the Uzumaki family had changed him. Made him more human in a way. And Kawaki, much like everyone else that met her, had not been immune to Himawari’s charms. The longer he’d stayed, the more she’d become like a sister to him. Seeing her like that now, older – but still somehow only sixteen - with the evidence of her trauma right there for everyone to see, must’ve hurt him too.

They reached the cell block easily. Simple bars and walls separating three cells – admittedly small, since locking the enemy up wasn’t exactly an option, considering who they were facing but it would be enough to hold Kawaki – as long as he was willing to be held. Sarada gave him a little push into the cell and turned the lock on the gate, effectively locking him in and giving her the space she’d been so desperate for.   
He spoke then, for the first time since entering the caves, his voice low but unwavering. “I'm not going to apologize.”  
For a moment, Sarada was floored, eyes flying up to meet his gaze. There, she saw his resolve, something she hadn’t seen in Sora-ku or on the way back. Was it Himawari? Had seeing her triggered this in him? This delusional belief that what he’d done was right? Justifiable somehow? Sarada spoke through clenched teeth, trying and failing at not being baited by him. “Why would you? You're never wrong.”  
He didn’t hesitate for a second. “I wasn't then.”  
Her jaw dropped in disbelief, “Yes, you were. I told you, again and again and again.” Sarada’s palms slammed against the bars with every word. “That there is _another way_.”  
“And where is it Sarada?” he taunted, “Have you found it yet? You haven't, have you?” Kawaki shook his head. “I stand by my decision.”  
“And it cost you everything!” Sarada grabbed onto the bars, pulling herself up against them, strands of hair coming loose from her pony tail and failing into her face. “Was it worth it, Kawaki?”  
He stepped away from her, giving her his back. Sarada stayed for a moment, a part of her desperate for his answer and a disgusted sound left her throat when she realized she would get nothing. She shoved away from the bars and turned away sharply.  
“Why do you look like this?” he asked and Sarada froze at the door, unsure if she’d heard him correctly. “Excuse me?”  
Kawaki glanced over her, his eyes narrowed, lips tight. “I don’t like it.”  
Sarada looked down at herself, her outfit was similar to what her mother had worn around her age but it was in no way inappropriate or that much different to what she’d worn when she was younger. The only big differences were that she’d had to stop wearing the Uchiha symbol, anything identifying someone as a shinobi or tying them to a hidden village put them in danger. Her hair was also significantly longer, reaching well past her slender shoulders but it was tied up and out of the way, practical. There was also the Byakugou seal that her mother had painstakingly passed down to her – but it was covered up. Annoyance rose in Sarada’s throat, adding to the fury that was already dangerously close to snapping through her fragile self-control.   
“Well, I am _so_ sorry, Lord Kawaki. I will endeavour to please you more in the future,” Sarada told him, sarcasm oozing from her tone. She bowed and after shooting him one last lingering glare, slammed the door shut behind her.   
  
  



	3. Reflections

Chapter 3 – Reflections

**_“You and I were bright, shooting through the sky daily,  
Lighting up the night, wasn't always right, baby,  
Yeah, every time that we realign it's crazy,  
And you save me.”_ **

Sarada slumped back against the wall outside the detainment area. She felt sickened and…embarrassed by her own behaviour. On the way back she’d promised herself she wouldn’t give him any reaction and yet somehow the moment he’d opened that mouth of his, she’d been drawn in, baited. Kawaki had always elicited an emotional response from her, usually she’d been able to control it more. It seemed their time apart had lessened that control she’d managed to have in her younger years.   
_I’m not going to apologize._  
Son of a bitch. Sarada exhaled harshly, giving a shake of her head as she pushed away from the wall. Whatever information Kawaki had would have to wait until Kakashi arrived. He clearly wasn’t about to just tell _her._ Sarada just hoped it was good news – they really could’ve used some of that right about then, but she doubted it strongly – her mind just couldn’t associate Kawaki with anything positive at that point.   
Maybe it was harsh, unfair even – but seeing him now had made his betrayal fresh once again. And as much as Sarada wanted to deny it – this was personal. These feelings were anything but becoming of a shinobi but try as she might, it was impossible to set them aside. She couldn’t forgive him.   
In the hallway outside, Shikamaru was already waiting, leaning against the door – a fresh cigarette between his fingers. Somehow the supplies always contained at least one pack for him.   
“Inojin came to get me,” he explained at her surprised look. “He’s in there then?” he nodded towards the detainment area behind her and Sarada gave a weary nod.   
“He agreed to be locked up, surprisingly.”  
Shikamaru took a long drag of his cigarette, “I take it things went well then?”  
“Define _well_ ,” Sarada summarized the events in Sora-ku and how they’d found Kawaki and well as his so-called willingness to cooperate, whatever that meant.  
“It has to be important for him to make contact with us after what happened in Konoha.” Shikamaru dropped the remains of his smoke to the ground, stepping down onto it. “I don’t like him but Kawaki isn’t the type to do something thoughtlessly.”  
Sarada knew Shikamaru was right – and yet, she was determined to find fault. To not trust Kawaki. “But that could go both ways. Good or bad intentions.”  
“Are you sure you’re not just judging Kawaki based on what happened in Konoha?”  
The moment of hesitation said enough. “Didn’t his actions then show us everything we need to know?” That Kawaki was their enemy no matter what. A little voice in the back of her mind whispered that Kawaki would never work with Kara or the Ōtsutsuki. The little voice was ignored.  
“From appearances alone, Kawaki has no reason to lie. Despite what happened, we still share the same enemy. I haven’t spoken to him yet but from my brief conversation with Chocho, he doesn’t seem to want to share any information until Kakashi gets here.” Shikamaru reached into his pocket, pulling the carton of cigarettes out but he seemed to reconsider, pushing it away again. “We’ll approach this with caution. Trust me, we aren’t just going to forget what happened either.”  
  
Shikamaru placed a guard at the door and Sarada felt hesitant about leaving the detention area. Were they putting too much trust in Kawaki? It would take nothing for him to break out. Were they really going to take him at his word? She glanced back to where the guard stood even after she separated from Shikamaru. _What are you planning, Kawaki?_  
Shikamaru, however hard he was to read, felt comfortable enough to leave just a guard at the door, so perhaps for the moment, Sarada could relax just a little. If Kawaki did decide to leave his cell unattended, she would have no choice but to bring him down by force. He’d once asked her to never use the Sharingan on him, and at the time, she’d agreed, but if he could break promises – so could she.

-

The mess hall was a buzz of activity. She just couldn’t escape him. Kawaki’s name was on everyone’s lips. It was almost unbearable. To go years without even a mention of him and within hours he was all she heard – all she thought of. As soon as Sarada slid into one of the benches, Chocho was there, a plate of food in hand. One she would undoubtedly finish herself but somehow, Sarada didn’t have much of an appetite. Chocho took a moment to finish chewing before she leaned in to speak. “You could forgive him, you know.”  
Sarada cut her friend a sharp look but Chocho was unaffected. “Hear me out. I know what he did was wrong-“ Sarada opened her mouth to interrupt but Chocho pointed a fork at her to shut her up. “I totally agree with that too. _But,_ even the Hokage said he could understand where Kawaki was coming from in those moments, despite it being wrong. And all he wanted was a chance to sit down with Kawaki and talk.”  
“And what? That’s supposed to make me forgive him?”  
“You know,” Chocho smiled slightly, knowingly and Sarada didn’t like it at all. “Call it my womanly intuition, but I always thought that maybe you liked Kawaki a little more than you let on.”  
Sarada rolled her eyes, “I’m supposed to forgive him because you think I liked him?”  
Chocho shrugged. “Think about it. It’s part of human nature to make mistakes, Sarada. Kawaki is only human – a damn fine one at that.”  
Sarada scoffed, pushing herself to her feet with every intention to leave but she stopped short, her hands clenching into fists on the table. Himawari was hurrying towards her, Hinata right behind her – a worried expression on the woman’s face. Sarada almost wanted to run away. She didn’t have the energy to deal with this now. But Himawari wasn’t giving her a choice.  
“Sarada,” she said, slightly breathless, a worried expression on her face. “Kawaki, is he-“  
“He’s being detained for the moment.” Sarada explained.  
“Oh, I know. They won’t let me in to see him.”  
Sarada gave her an unimpressed look, knowing that Himawari had waited until Sarada left before approaching the guard. Hinata appeared behind Hima, putting a hand on her shoulder – the look she gave Sarada was almost apologetic.   
“Please let me speak to him,” Hima asked, not even bothering to hide her desperation.  
Sarada’s gaze went from Hinata to Himawari, she didn’t know how to tell them no. Kakashi had to have the last say in this, it wasn’t up to her despite the fact that she’d been the one to ultimately lock him up. Hinata seemed to understand that. Himawari – not so much.  
“I can’t-“  
Himawari reached up, fingers brushing against her eyepatch. “I just…want to speak to him.”  
Sarada felt like she’d been punched in the gut. She’d tried very hard to forget that day, to erase it from her memories for good. Sometimes she thought she’d succeeded. But then it would creep up on her again, flashes of blood, screams, her own fingers gripping his arm – their arms, her voice begging one of them to stop and the other –  
Sarada took a shaky breath. Forgetting wasn’t easy, but she knew it was harder for Himawari, the evidence of that day was there every day when she looked into the mirror.  
“Hima, I don’t have the power to okay this,” she wasn’t sure if it was a lie, but it hurt Himawari none the less. “The Rokudaime needs to-“  
“But he’s not even here!” she argued, “Can I just get five minutes?”  
Sarada sighed, “Did you ask Shikamaru-san? He’s second in command, you know that.” Sarada recognized the look on Hima’s face immediately. “Ah. He said no?”  
Himawari’s shoulders slumped and Hinata put her arm around her daughter. “I’ll speak to Kakashi-sensei when he gets back myself,” she promised and Himawari who, despite the quivering in her lip, nodded.  
Hinata threw an apologetic look towards Sarada as she steered her daughter away, Sarada was about to leave herself but Chocho flagged her down, once again pointing the fork at her. “So you don’t think Kawaki ever liked you back?”  
“Are you _still_ on about this?” Sarada’s hands went to her hips as she looked down at Chocho disapprovingly.   
Chocho ignored that. “Well? Do you?”  
“ _No,_ I don’t. He just said as much to me anyway.”  
Chocho choked on her food, coughing slightly with wide eyes on Sarada, “ _What?_ Why am I only hearing about this now?”  
“Maybe because it’s not important?”  
“ _Oh,_ it’s extremely important. _Tell me everything,_ ” Chocho demanded, her voice hoarse from coughing as she grabbed a glass of water and chugged it down.   
Half annoyed, Sarada leaned her hip against the bench. “There’s nothing to tell. He told me he doesn’t like the way I look.”  
 _I don’t like it_.   
What the hell did that even mean? As much as she tried to tell herself that it meant nothing, she couldn’t help but feel a little bitter.  
“He sounds like he’s in denial.” Chocho nodded. “My womanly intuition is telling me that,”   
Sarada was about to shoot that down but the door to the mess hall slammed open, a masked ANBU standing on the other side. An ANBU here only meant one thing. Sarada’s heart stuttered in her chest as she pushed away from the bench.  
“Uchiha Sarada.” He called. “Come with me.”

Kakashi had returned.   
  
-

Kawaki was already in the room, handcuffed and waiting. He didn’t look up when she entered and Sarada astutely avoided the area where he stood. Mitsuki stood off to the side on the other side of the large desk and he threw a friendly smile at her when she entered but it turned reassuring when he saw her worried look.   
_Everything will be okay,_ his eyes seemed to say and Sarada really hoped he was right.  
“Well, Kawaki. I have to say I’m surprised to see you here.” Kakashi began.   
“Yeah, and? What do you want me to do about that?” Kawaki asked and Sarada sighed. This was going to be a long day. Kawaki shot her a frown but Sarada continued to ignore him.  
“Perhaps you could start by explaining how exactly you found the location of our supply drop,”  
“Does it really matter? I said I have information. Is that really more important right now?” Kawaki demanded and Kakashi leaned back, appearing not to care for the situation. Or Kawaki’s attitude.  
“If you want, please Kawaki,” Kakashi waved a hand, unconcerned. “You have the floor.”  
The occupants of the room, Kakashi, Shikamaru, Mitsuki and Sarada all turned their attention to Kawaki who attempted to appear unaffected by all the eyes on him, the sudden pressure but Sarada knew him well enough to recognize the tell-tale signs of what he was feeling.  
“Naruto has been captured by Ōtsutsuki Momshiki’s faction and Sasuke and Sakura are currently being pursued by them.” Kawaki told them with such ease that the room fell into silence. Sarada stared at him, her mind trying to piece together what she’d just heard out of his mouth. The others were talking, urgency rising in the air around them, pushing for answers that Sarada didn’t hear. Words floated around in her mind, all just out of grasp. _Mama. Papa. Hokage. Ōtsutsuki. Kawaki._ And all at once the information made _sense._ Her body locked up, a harsh breath filling her lungs as her eyes widened and suddenly she was in the air, launching herself at Kawaki. They crashed back against the table but Sarada’s fist never connected with his face. Mitsuki’s arm had extended with startling speed as if he’d known what was coming, fingers curling around her wrist, holding her back. But Sarada seemed unconcerned with that, her fist gripped Kawaki’s shirt tightly as she bent him over the table.  
“How dare you,” she demanded, voice shaking, eyes suddenly red and wide and filled with unshed tears. “It’s been _hours._ You’ve know they were in danger for _hours.”  
_ “If I’d told you, you would have rushed after them.” He told her, not moving despite the uncomfortable way she was pressing him into the desk with his arms bound between them.  
Now, Sarada strained against Mitsuki’s hold. “ _Yes,”_ she whispered. “I would have. They’re my family.”  
“You would have gotten yourself killed.” Kawaki snapped. It only fuelled her anger more. “No,” Sarada shook her head, eyes squeezing shut, her tears spilling from her eyes and dripping down onto him. “I’m going to kill you.” Sarada pulled at her arm, “ _Mitsuki,”_ she snapped through clenched teeth, trying again to pull her arm free – using all of her strength. Mitsuki grunted, his fingers snapping free as Sarada cried out, her arm finally slamming down towards Kawaki. “Sarada, don’t!” Mitsuki reached out towards her again but it was too late. Kawaki squeezed his eyes shut as he tried to get his hands free in time.  
The table cracked, breaking into pieces and crashing to the ground at their feet. Kawaki opened his eyes slowly, brows drawing together. Sarada’s grip on his shirt was the only thing holding him up, she stared down at him for a moment, tears wet on her cheeks, her chest heaving. She released him after a moment, dropping him down onto what was left of the table as Mitsuki appeared at her side, putting his hand on her shoulder.   
“My, my,” Kakashi said.   
“You were going to let her kill me,” Kawaki accused, glaring up at Kakashi.  
Kakashi hummed, glancing towards Sarada. “No, but not for the reasons you think.”   
Sarada rubbed her palms under her eyes roughly. “I’m fine.” She turned her eyes towards Kawaki, the Sharingan gone. “Where are they?”  
“I only know their last known location.” Kawaki said, looking away from Sarada pointedly as he pushed himself to his feet.   
“Then point it out on a map. I’m leaving immediately.” Sarada told him, turning to the wall behind her and tapping the map impatiently.  
“No.”  
Sarada turned back to him, her fists clenching at her sides. “ _No?_ ”  
“He means he wants to come with you.” Shikamaru surmised and Kakashi stepped forward, “I can’t approve that, Kawaki.”  
“I don’t want him with me.” Sarada said immediately.   
“I wasn’t asking for permission,” Sarada noticed for the first time that Kawaki’s restraints were gone but she wasn’t sure when he’d managed to escape them.  
“And how did you suppose this would go then?” Kakashi asked. “That we would just let you go?”  
“You guys don’t trust me, fine – I don’t really care.” Kawaki squared Kakashi with a look. “But I’m the only one who knows their last known location. You want to find them? I’m the only one who can make that happen.”  
“So what you’re saying is that you’re not giving us a choice?” Mitsuki asked, a disapproving frown curving his mouth down.  
“I’m sure we could make him tell us,” Shikamaru said, “But we can also use this as an opportunity to test his loyalty.”  
“And if he betrays us?” Sarada’s voice was low, as if she was accepting the inevitable. That Kawaki had some hidden agenda – maybe not against the shinobi world, but against _her._ Keeping this from her…was a betrayal she couldn’t forgive.   
“He won’t get the chance.” Mitsuki promised but Kawaki kept his gaze down as if he felt Sarada’s glare on him  
The Rokudaime heaved a defeated sigh, as much as he attempted to protect Sarada, as important as her Sharingan was, he knew he couldn’t keep her from this. “Fine,” Kakashi said. “Team Sarada will investigate this, but first,” Kakashi stepped closer to Kawaki. “We have a few questions,”

**Author's Note:**

> I swear I was writing a sasusaku AU and I have no idea where this came from. Maybe I want to hurt people like Isayama hurt me with aot chapter 138.
> 
> Just kidding :( that's definitely NOT where this story is going... ;)


End file.
